Wednesday, February 16, 2005

A Big Conclusion

All these days my blogs have been filled with my personal anguishes and my crazy ideas about myself, it is time i started moving. This will be the last one in which i will mention about my classmates and the stuff. I have been wrong in a way all these days, Midhun isn't an asshole really, he tried being friendly with the gals and i took it personally as if he was trying to peep into our group. It ain't the reality. Wat group? Me, Praneeth, Pappu, Sid, Rahul, Ponny, Leepa, Athira and niths never was any group. It happened that we guys saw more of each other during the first days and i started liking their companionship rather than of anyone else.... Days passed and it turned out to be something with cracks in it. The gals were never like us and they wanted guys who are more caring and more understanding, not the ones like us who takes life as it comes. Thus it was natural that the fairer species moved on towards people of our species who happens to be more caring than us. That is the plain truth. And the bitterest thing was i failed to understand it.

I talked with ponni for around 1hr oer fone. I believe she took it personally. Gotta, it was her chaddi buddies i was trying to degrade. Never again will i fail to express the things that comes to my mind to any single jerk. I boozed today and was in a real destructive frame of mind from morning. All these happens dude. Take it easy, it is just another day in ur long life. Ponni must have understood wat i meant. I hated that guy at the beginning and now i realize that it was my failure as a human. He cracked something about Praba and i shouldve snapped at him the same instant and never carried it on in my heart. Arun is paranoid. the whole thing started once he said his conspiracy theory and it surely sounded helluva nice then. Ponni said she moved out coz of Rahul; I dont find a reason. Perhaps she might have formed a personal thing about him. Anyway Rahul is one of us and no single one in the fairer sex can make me stand against him, coz he is a guy with goodness in his heart. So dude, it was ur failure in understanding wat ur friends in the fairer sex required, they wanted care, affection, love... and with ur strong arrogant head u never understood all that and u never can be that kinda person. Coz u lives for the moment and it is just ur family who gets the most of ur goodness, leave it dude, the guys are chumma great. The best ones in the class. The ones with the attitude and ideas, the jack of all trades....

Rahul presented his seminar with 3 larges of dry Vodka down his throat. He did it great. Praneeth was amazing, guys are chumma great. I believe, we all can never be again as the same old way, coz it was never there. It was something that happened coz of not knowing each other..... Christ it is time i went home. Feeling sleepy. Will be off to Chennai tomorrow, gotta keep a chek on my first love, Chechi. Hope she is fine and everything is at its best with her help.

Common God, be there by my side. This guy who happens to spend the major part of his day boozed and who complains a lot. Never again, Watver happens I DONT GIVE A DAMN. It is my family, my friends and no one else. No place for a dislike to creep in...

Monday, February 14, 2005

Flop V-Day

It was a stinking day. Christ, i wish i was at home with appa n amma, they are the ones i love genuinely. Christ, wat life? Couple of senior sluts called me up in the morning and came the helluva interrogation. wat do they expect? that i will pee in my pants. They even made Leepa cry. Praneeth came late and Pooja(manas flame) changed her plans. Pappu was rocking as usual and rahul and sid and nits were there. Hey, sid gifted niths a card.. is the guy serious? all the best both of u. And then about Ponni? She looked like she finds Count Draculla reincarnated in me. She is still away in her world. I doesn't know. But all together.. if this is how she gonna be, i too ain't gonna give a damn about her.
Everyone was in a hurry to reach home after college. Another thing, Leepa looked nice with her new hairdo. I can sense something building up in Tobin for her.... Hii Hiii
Gotta go and will be bak soon

Friday, February 11, 2005

The event full Friday

though i had promised that i will never write anything about her, gotta do. I got a gift voucher from Belgaum, and the only person i know who lives oer ther is her. Christ, she still cares about me and me about her. Poor kid, i should have said yes. Dude, wat is ur probs? U got oer it or u are trying for that. Leave her and ol memories bak in ur trash can and face life. Dont expect old faces to come to life again. U made it dead and now u gotta live that way.
Some one stole my wallet from tain. Lucky guy, he got 1k, on most days he would've been disappointed.
dad is having high blood pressure and.. stuff. Responsibilities are coming on. Earlier used to say that no one gave a damn about my ideas and now it is something like they want me to pour in my ideas. Christ.
It gonna be valentines day on Monday. Doesn't have any special person with whom i could celebrate it. Gals in my life ain't all that imp(mom and sisters xcluded)
will be back on Monday with new stuff

Wednesday, February 9, 2005

Post Seminar n a MAD me

The Seminar went fine. i did an average work. wasn't in the best frame of mind. Niths and PP did their seminar too. They did it nicely. Ponni had mugged the whole thing. it was like she wanted to prove the point to our stinking mam. Christ aint she sick? Dont know wat the hell the whole thing is about.
Now i am feeling like hell, after all those long lectures and that son of a bitch Midhun hanging around our group. The guy and his friends need real whipping. Hey why on earth am i taking the whole thing so personally, the gals in my group stinks at times. Niths have been an expection. The rest chumma haven't.... nope i aint sure. i gonna ask the asshole to mind his business with his gal wat is her name? Ashwathy right. if he doesn't he sure got me at her back. Teach him to mind his porridge.
Wat has gone wrong in our group? is it that everyone has grown more possessive. I haven't been like this ever before. I never gave a damn about any one else. Was free like hell and didn't mind the single thing in world. Wat the hell, will either blast the whole thing or move away from the gals. Christ i am sick.

Saturday, February 5, 2005

Ol Flames

I chatted with Shivani for more than an hour. She has founded a dude whom she suppose is great. Happy for her. At least she found out one. Look at me, said no to the best gal who ever came in my life and now looking around at the weirdest places. Christ, wat should be said about me? I gotta keep outta touch with her, doesn't want to rekindle any of the ol flames. Will try my max to not be online the same time she logs in. She said He isn't like me . He is athletic and is hard. Christ, we together messed the perfect relation. All for wat? Just coz U wouldnt have to hurt ur parents at the end dude. the ones who gave birth to u, the ones who made u this tall.
Great! I understand. The place i made her leave is still void in my life. I know someone will be there to occupy that void and make me whole. Shivani is history. I wouldn't ever mention about her. All the best dear. Keep rocking and enjoy ur life. We will always remain as mates who will always wish the other one luck. Bon voyage love, for ur journeys into the unknown.

Tuesday, February 1, 2005


New Year started of nicely, with me developing a crush about someone. But yep got oer it. The first weeks of Jan went fine and smooth and was rocking. But as time went i could sense cracks building up in our group. It all started after the week our class was suspended. Arun poured a bucket of trash or truth and we chumma grew apart. the guys at one side and the gals at the other end. Niths and Sidhu wasn't aware of it, coz they usually don't attend classes. I sensed it first and thought that it was just my wild imagination. But then Pappu and Praneeth too had the same feelings and Christ weren't we true. The gals didn't give a damn about us. Now that aint one expects of straight friends. Everything should and could be settled with proper conversation. We too drifted away and never gave them a chance to talk. I personally felt like hell. The ones i thought was mine were not even giving a hood about me. Then came the eventful monday and things got worse, and these guys Midhun and his group were crowding around my friends. And it seemed like they liked more to be with them rather than us...... Christ, i turned into a depressed psycho. Was doubt full of every one and Praneeth and Pappu sure helped me and i thing we all had the same kinda feelings.Thank god Niths and Sidhu wasn't aware of the all thing. Then the ice began melting, it is on the move. Everyone has started talking once again with everyone. But still we don't wait for the gals to go outta college. And sure the leeches are still there. Have i grown possessive? or is it any kinda envy creeping in me? if it is so, then for wat use? I believe, we guys complement each other pretty well and no one else in the class got the stuff to be in our league. Ponny, Athira nad Leepa sure can't be replaced with the other gals in the class. They are unique just like us and they are.............
The whole situation is being reviewed by me and 4pack and sure will have the solution. Did Midhun play any creepy stuff? i doubt it, coz the guy chumma sounds like a backstabber. I still remember the first month when i had brought my school photos for Pappu, this guy was all nuts. He said something about being lucky to have all these gals and made some wisecrack about the way me and Prabha was linked. Guy hasn't met great gals in life, that is wat i made out. But then wat is his probs if i got scores of friends oer the map. I don't know, but am dead sure of one thing he dislikes us that is me, Pappu and Praneeth. Christ his name makes me sick.
Got a seminar tomorrow and god knows wat i gonna do with that. I doubt my abilities. Cmmon guy, u got balls and u sure have been at far more tough places and gatherings. after all it is just ur class. U sure can provide the class with a smart piece of work. Remember the ones u did at school in front of all those strange faces and judges. yep, i can. see u morrow after the seminar.
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